Polydoxy allows for the development of experiments that make use of absurdity and mimesis as forms of theological reflection. This article performs such an experiment on some examples of the invocation of divine fatherhood in contemporary trinitarian theology. It is common to claim that God is Father in a way that either transcends any other form of fatherhood, or is only properly Father in the trinity and so in relation to the Son, not in relation to any human patriarchy. By reading first divine fatherhood, then trinitarian forms of kinship, in registers that move from the straightforward into the absurd, I show that such claims do not tend to loosen the bonds between divine and human fatherhood; rather, they tighten those bonds in unexpected ways. In conclusion, the implications of the experiment for the relation between queer and feminist reading practices and systematic theology are explored.